Chew Piin Huann 丘品焕

At what point does a director thinks that the movie he is filming is good enough? At what point does a painter thinks that his painting is good enough and stop? How about writer? photographer? songwriter? What is 'good'? Are there quantitative measures like KPIs in business or metrics to be fulfilled? Or it is purely a generic feeling thingy? Most importantly, must the creator like the creation himself like how a fan likes it? The most controversial thing about art is the creation of art school itself.  Art by definition means 'the product of human creativity'. Creativity means something that is groundbreaking and new. How can we teach someone to create something 'new'? 'Teaching' means replication and it means that we are passing something existing to the next person. It is not something new, it is not creativity, and thus, it is not an art.  Perhaps the career as artist itself is also controversial.  An art

I did not buy insurance. I don't have one. And this excited many insurance agents as I am the rare breed that can be their potential client. The most common pitch I received is: "Imagine you suddenly contracted certain disease and you are lying on deathbed but you have no money, how will you feel? You are going to die, don't you afraid?You should protect yourself, start from now." This statement is made based on one big assumption: "The longer life is, the better it is." or, "We must live as long as possible." What if we question it by thinking the opposite? What if I think, my life has already completed and I don't need more of them? I have lived for 25 years. I have done many wonderful things. I am born under two lovely parents, I played so many video games and sports, I scored so well in exams. I had wonderful university life. I had been to many many countries. I am able to explore so many knowledge and parts of the universe. I have

In recent years, there is this hot trend of 'reading'. Everyone started building their 'reading list' and putting 'reading books' as a mandatory item in their bucket lists. Since young we were told by everyone superior than us that 'reading is good', 'you should read more', 'knowledge is wealth'. Things were getting more tensed when journalists started telling everyone that every successful person wakes up at 4am to read and they read 60 books a year, and also every book becomes 'Must-read if you want to become successful and happy'. At the same time there were a lot of hoax-y pseudo statistics that were circulating around telling people which country's citizens read the most and how it was related to economical successes. The outcome? Happy book publishers, bookstore owners, writers (Of course the happiest will be the pseudo writers who claimed themselves as authors but in fact they are merely information refurbishers or

Wow wow wow. I am really 'impressed'. In a useless 'management class' with all the futile bullshit theories, everyone took it very seriously, copy notes and take them as gold. In the possibly most useful class about fire prevention, no one takes notes, no one asks questions, no one cares. I really wonder will they remember how to use the fire extinguishers. They don't. There are even people staying upstair in the office, not attending the talk because 'they have alot of important work to do' What's the logic? I am really trying to understand what's going on in their minds. They totally reversed the logic. What's more important? Work or life? The most important thing to hedge about in our life is our life. The reason they care about the management class is simple, it's something directly impacting them. Their job, whether they will perform better and get promoted, whether they will climb higher and receive better pays. It's '

The silliest thing about human being: * Every single inferior is fear of superior * Every single superior thinks he/she is above of the inferior People called it "The common sense". And they think this is how the world should be ran. The scarier truth is, if we do the opposite, the world will be so much more richer and better.  * An inferior who constantly challenges and questions the superior will only make the superior see him/her as an impressive non-confirmist that challenges status quo * A superior who constantly presents himself humbly and even admitted himself as inferior will only make the inferiors respect, adore or even idolise him/her more.  And both of the above are only benefits to the individuals, there is a hidden astronomical benefit behind: Real meritocracy in practice. The chain effect is the crazy profits and unimaginable growth for the company and business. When people forget about hierarchy and statuses, they can only put everything into

二零一七年七月十二日 晚上八点五十二分 今天吃完晚饭后，爸爸和妈妈坐在电视机前，为某一件事情争吵着。 他们买了一张电视台增值卡，要把号码输入到简讯里发出去才能增值，然后才能购买和看到某一些频道。 其实整个过程对一个年轻人来说是再容易不过一分钟搞定的事，但他们就是弄了好久好久都弄不到。 我坐他们身后的沙发，看着他们俩的背影，我马上联想到很多事情，然后就忍不住上楼回房大哭，哭到泣不成声。 我联想到这是以后的他们。两个与世界脱节了的老人，已经丧失了很多能力，有很多事情都已经没办法做好了。 看着爸爸只能一个号码逐个逐个非常非常慢地输入，而且还会输入错的那种。 我尝试解释了很多很多很多遍，他们都听不懂。 妈妈连手机也不太会用，教了她很多次要怎样进Maxis的App她还是搞不太懂。 最近跟他们聊天，也发现我们越来越有代沟了。很多我新学到的知识和在外面看到的东西，他们都好像听不太懂。而且在很多事情的看法上分歧越来越大了，特别是我越来越有自己分析真理和看世界的方法。 我联想到这是我不在他们身边的时候是这样的，他们很多东西都不懂，就只能这样碰碰撞撞抹黑。 我联想到这是以后我不在他们身边的时刻，很多事情他们只能靠自己，但自己却已经没有了 能力。很多他们要做的事，却不懂怎么做也做不到，那种无力感和沮丧。 我联想到以后他们万一连走也走不动，看东西也看不见时，怎么办。 真的很恐怖，联想到这我就真的很怕。 以前这种画面在戏剧里看得非常多，但当时没身在其境，不能体会。以前都觉得我爸妈很好，我还是可以想小孩一样依偎在他们身旁。 不知道是他们真的变老了，还是因为我真的长大了才会领悟到这些问题。 现在我亲身深切地感觉和体会到了。 我真的到了那个成人阶段了。怎么办啊，我没时间了。 几年前的我十分偏执，十分幼稚。我总是认为他们不太会科技，或是思考逻辑不太清晰，他们就应该学，我甚至会想说就是没人逼他们所以他们学不会。我真的太幼稚了。他们是在不同年代长大的，他们没有我成长年代的发达资讯，所以他们不会根本就是无可厚非啊。 我小时候什么都不会时他们从没有埋怨过，那我现在凭什么要求他们，凭什么啊。 我最最最害怕的是，有一天，他们觉得不要麻烦我，很多东西都往自己吞，很多东西都不告诉我，很多东西都不再找我帮他们做了。我最

舍弃是一个比得到更珍贵的技能，而且强大好几千倍。 追求梦想最难的不是追求梦想，最难的是要做很多很多达到梦想所需要做的，完全不符合梦想本质的琐事。

Rules to success: Rule 1 : Don't make mistakes. Rule 2 : If you have to make mistakes, make it as low cost as possible. Rule 3 : If you have to make high cost mistakes, make it as early as possible. Rule 4 : Rule 1 is inapplicable. Go for Rule 2 and Rule 3. Rule 5 : Rule 2 is infeasible before applying Rule 3. So, go for Rule 3 first! How simple! And sweet. <3 br="" nbsp="">Hahaha.

人生活了三分一，才发现最神的技能是认输和失败。因为要主动认输，主动失败，主动做错的事，主动愚蠢，主动平常心，主动压抑自己，真的太难太难了。正常人都不会那么做，而我们大部分都是正常人。 失败是成功之母，非常有名的一句话。如果我们认为这句话是对的，那在我们考试不及格的时候，我们应该欣喜若狂不是吗？在客户拒绝或骂我们服务很烂时，我们应该高兴啊！在我们不受经理赏识或重用时，我们应该开香槟庆祝呀！这时候有人会说：“你神经病是吗？那你妈死掉你是不是应该搞个派对而不是丧礼啊？这...这根本不符合逻辑呀！” 逻辑，好。我就跟你谈逻辑。失败是成功之母这句话的根本逻辑，就是说失败是成功的母亲。而按照人类史上从石器时代时寥寥无几的人口数量，增长到今时今日的70亿人口，说明人类繁殖的能力是惊人的，说明能够成功生出孩子成为母亲的是大多数人，而没成为母亲的人是少数。那如果说失败是成功的母亲的话，那说明有了失败，接踵而来的就是成功。有了母亲的存在，孩子自然出现。我不敢用“必然”这词，但概率是超级超级大的，大到我们近乎可以用“肯定”这词。失败过后，就肯定会成功。 这逻辑，不是更有逻辑吗？ 下次有人笑你肥时，你应该要窃喜，然后说：“哈哈真的叻我真的很肥，好开心啊！” 下次有人说干没出息的工作时，你应该开香槟庆祝：“有人说我没出息诶，好棒啊！” 下次有人吐槽你说你能力差时，你应该大笑然后说：“谢谢你啊！我最想要的就是人家吐槽我了，好兴奋呀！” 这些都不是暗讽或反讽，这是真心认输，主动认错。 读到这里，你肯定认为我是脑袋生草生虫了是吧，或者可能早在开头就把这视窗给关了。 呵呵，如果你没办法明白上面所说的，你真的不能成功。 全世界都要赢不要输，如果你主动认输，输得彻彻底底，这时候你就真的赢了！ (越不符合逻辑的话，越要听。这叫：反思。)

大自然真的是几残酷一下的。 随随便便开始了这个世界的进化论，然后让它一直用自我启动模式。 让动物有了繁殖能力（最重要还要做到繁殖是动物最喜欢做的事），然后就这样第一种物种一直繁殖，生了新一代。 那新一代就会面对环境的调战，没有人教它们怎么生存，就是自己随便走走寻寻觅觅，好运的话活长一点，不好运的话遇上了灾祸就马上死了。就这样，完全是随机。 然后就这样因为环境的挑战，物种本身被逼进化。 就这样在很多很多年后有了人类。 我想一开始的猿猴不能用语言交谈（也因此比较少甚至还没有人类今天复杂的情感吗？），他们生了小猿猴后怎么知道要尽全力保护他们呢？（哺乳动物还真的是伟大的进化） 后来的人类更之强大了，父母都有尽全力保护孩子的能力和心态了。还发明了教育。 蔡康永说，人类为什么自居万物之王。我们的世界其实没有变得更好，不断改变只是宿命而已。大自然是无情的，暴击就是人生最正常的事。坏事和死本来就是世界里最最正常的事，有人承诺过我们人生一定是快乐的吗？如果我们的人生是100%暴击的话其实根本不为过，因为没有人承诺过我们一定点的快乐，哪怕1%. 人类真的真的是有邪恶那面的。至少一半吧。 看了看周遭，发现现在很多人还是非常享受生活。享受科技的好玩，享受世界文明带来的多姿多彩。还有很多人都愿意花钱去干这个那个的。没那么多疑虑。 这也是资讯这把双面刃，它让我们知道了很多机会，也让我们知道非常多带来疑虑的坏事。 不需要庸人自扰。发生了再算。 "I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened" - Mark Twain

I am always torn between two kinds of motivations: - Positive reinforcements and love - Negative punishments and fear I did not know how to choose. My heart has always been telling me the former while the society has always been advocating for the latter. I do not understand the partisan that cries for "Negative punishments and fear". Warnings and fears are their alter egos. They never stop hoaxing others to do what they deem as the right thing, and demanding everyone to pursue their version of success. "You should do this, you should do that" is their punch line. They reprimand others for their mistakes, and they do not tolerate and embrace diversity other than what they think. They want everyone to avoid mistakes by all means, and they condemn people for not avoiding mistakes. They warn people to not giving too much of compliments or else that will grow a person's ego. I found this type of philosophy (or I should call it as 'shallow thinking')

一个自卑和内向的人24小时都会想自己有什么不够好，自己能够怎样做才能变得更好来满足你。 检讨自己警惕自己是垃圾永远是我们的责任。 那些所谓“不检讨的话不会进步，会变懒惰”的话在我们身上根本不成立。我们是睡觉都会梦见我们被责骂和唾弃的人，我们没有一秒敢怠惰，因为我们真的很怕自己又再被人叫“垃圾”。 我们已经非常非常非常地努力了。你们可以不要再说我们错了可以吗？我们要的，只是你们说我们没有错而已。 “对的人，配得起你的人，会接受你的全部；不能接受你全部的人，不是对的人，也配不起你。" 我们是多么想像上面那句话说的那样做，但是我们不敢，我们很害怕那再被遗弃的感觉。我们也不会那么做，因为我们知道那感受，我们会尽毕生之力来阻止另一个人去承受我们所承受过的。 Everyone matters, love matters, belief matters. I won't leave out anyone.

It feels so sad to read the final chapter of a great book. Just like that feeling I had as a kid after finished watching the last episode of a really wonderful drama. That feeling of parting with the authors and characters whom you have mingled with so deeply. You are going to leave them, going back to your own life, fighting that battle by yourself. It sounds lonely, but they will always be at your back, fighting together with you.

Information (books, video clips, articles, magazines) are meant to help you to achieve certain aims. That creates a huge paradox. People who need information the most won't read things. People who read alot alot of things are people who don't need those information. People who need Facebook the most to facilitate communication don't use Facebook that often. People who use Facebook very often are the people who don't need the instant communication. Book writers and Facebook are making the most amount of money on information, creating information tsunami which leads to analysis paralysis. Unless you find it entertaining to watch tutorials. Which I think is pretty weird. I found it more fun to cook myself than to sitting in front of a cooking show watching the cook teaching me how to cook. I found it more fun to go down to field to play the sports myself .

好累。 非常努力地熬过了四个月（还是其实是两年？)，却总感觉自己有几千几万里路要走。 是自己那把尺过长吗？还是它缺乏的是伸缩性？ 究竟天意是可违，还是不可违 究竟我应该相信慢条斯理系的“顺其自然” 还是应该相信作死派的“命运在自己手里” 前者说好事自然会发生，冥冥中自有安排，道不可违，宇宙万物自然界定律不可，也不可能逆，太阳地球月亮宇宙都有自己的轨道，作息和法则。 后者说人是完全由身边的人和环境所主宰的，只要有对的方法和励志的伙伴及环境，所有极限都能被突破。 如果前者是对的话，那为什么人类史上有那么多绝地反击的逆袭故事，有那么多一个有一个创造历史突破人类极限的神人？为什么我们能够在一次又一次的灾祸中生存，突破并创造巨变？为什么那么多的寒门子弟能够卧薪尝胆突破重围，为什么我们能一次又一次的创造革命，创造了各种各样神奇的工具，机械，高楼，科技？为什么人类这品种当中有那么都出类拔萃的作家，音乐家，诗人，舞蹈家，演员，导演，摄影师，画家，国家领导人，运动员，健身巨人，智商破表的天才，智力过人的科学家，思想家，创业家？在人类史里，他们个个都是极其伟大的神话。 如果后者是对的话，那又怎么解释天地山水的形成，那又怎么解释世界从哪来，生命从哪来，地球星星月亮从哪来，太阳系银河系和宇宙从哪来。为什么宇宙那么他妈的大，为什么外太空那么的暗，那么地恐怖，为什么其他星球什么鬼都没有，为什么所有星球都有固定的轨道永远不脱轨（它们的自制力那么强吗），为什么太阳那么他妈的热（我常想想如果把一个人送到太阳会怎样，想到就毛骨悚然），为什么有地心吸力，为甚么有能量，究竟我是什么，人是什么，存在是什么，究竟是不是有人（神）在上面看着我们干什么，究竟是不是所以事情都已经安排好？ 如果前者是对的话，那人生好没趣。 如果后者是对的话，那人生好辛苦好恐怖。 比起其他在地球上的生物，我们人还真的是万物之王，叱咤风云，呼风唤雨。 比起全宇宙，我们人只是在千万颗星球里其中一颗沙尘里用显微镜都看不见的微生物。 我们认为我们非常渺小，但其实我们有着改变千万种东西的可能。 我们自以为是万物之王，但其实我们只是在一个小角落自high。 却想就觉得越confused, 第一次觉得认输才是王道，第一次觉得就算不懂任何东西也不要紧，第一次不再想要控制我的人生。 或许，不再去纠结什么